Two days until certain death.

Saturday, July 12, 2014. 10 AM, CST.

May Scott and I rest in peace.

I can’t live in Kansas City and not ride the world’s tallest water slide. It’s true – world’s tallest. They have pushed back the opening date of the slide for safety adjustments. It’s open, running and ready to send us flying to our watery death. Or maybe smacked into a tree. I need to check out the terrain.

It’s called the Verruckt. I have no idea how to pronounce it but they say it means “insane” in German.

Oh shit.

Oh crap in my pants.

A 168 feet, 7 inch drop. And at what foot marker do bikini tops go flying off?

Insane? I’ve been called worse. What’s German for “you-crazy-ass-voodoo-practicing-witch-I-haven’t-shot-my-deer-yet.”

Scott doesn’t want to do this. He’s not insane. He offered to stay with the kids at the bottom like a responsible adult.  ‘Til death do us part, SCOTT. We’re going together covered in each other’s pee. A couple friends have offered to sit at the pool bar and “cheers” us down. I hope in their drunken stupor they can catch my bikini top. It’s like the bouquet at a wedding. Who’s going to die next?

We’re totally filming this with our Go Pro camera.

Meet us there. Who’s IN?

 

This is probably my last blog post. Our will is on the bedside table.

I love you all.

 

What is the craziest thing you have ever done? It’s not the craziest thing I’ve done but it’s up there – WAY up there. Would you ride the Verruckt? 

photo-29 blog

11 thoughts on “Two days until certain death.

  1. What’s the craziest thing you’ve done then, Jules? Aside from not getting hammered drunk until college, that is. Lol. And yes, I’d try the slide. I have three kids so it’s win-win for me.

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  2. I am afraid if heights – a couple if summers ago climbed to the top of a 60 foot tower and zip-lined off – jumped and scraped my fat but on the platform before sliding to the end – fun – I did it again the next year without scraping my rear! Have a blast

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    • Ha! Ow!! I have never zip-lined. Where did you do that at? Glad you went twice. We’ll see if I do the slide twice! My stomach drops watching the video.

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  3. Oh Lord! You are one brave BUG, Julie!!! Not even if you offered me $10,000…well, I take that back, it would have to be a minimum of $10,000 then I would consider it. Stop staying you are going to die, though. Please? 🙂

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    • I’m just kidding!! Mostly. It’s just that they kept pushing back opening date due to safety concerns. Freaking me out!!
      Hey, did you see my Mahi???? Look at post before this.

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