Best. Homework. Ever.

Oh, I’m pumped. Emma brought home the class “pet,” Bailey. Bailey will be living with us for a week. We need to take pictures and write a journal entry on Bailey’s adventures.

Get ready for your big show, Bailey dog.
Get ready for your big show, Bailey dog.

The class will learn next week that Emma’s mom is the master at sending taxidermy animals on adventures. My mind is already racing with ideas. Ready…set…RUFF!

To be continued…


The Rack.

Oh, Scott is going to strangle me when he reads this. He doesn’t always read my blog so maybe this will squeak by.

Well, you see … it all started with this:


Scott failed to tell me he picked up one of his deer at the taxidermist. You can imagine the shock on my face upon seeing this in the car.

Fine. Whatever. The crap I put up with.

I drove Scott to the airport after picking up Emma from school. Scott rode in the back with the girls while I got crazy looks from semi-truck drivers looking down into the passenger seat.

We get to the airport. Scott gets his things and reaches over the deer to give me a kiss goodbye.

Don’t try and move the deer in the house. I’ll call Hunter and ask him to come over and move it for you.

What? I don’t need Hunter’s help.

You’ll bang it or something. Or throw it down the stairs. I know how you are with my hunting stuff. It’s very fragile, especially the rack. Just let Hunter move it. I’ll meet you in Napa this weekend. Love you. Bye.

How dare he think I can’t handle moving it. Hunter doesn’t need to come over. I’m not that kind of woman. I can do it myself. I’ll text him a picture of the deer safely put away. Hey wait. Pictures…

Oh, this will be good.

What's for dinner, mom?
What’s for dinner, mom?
Ooooo. Fancy table for the guest!
Ooooo. Fancy table! For me?
Hey wait, that's not Hunter is it?
Hey wait, that’s not Hunter is it?
I'm singin' in the rain...
“So fresh and so clean clean.”
Hey do you think the neighbors can see my rack?
Hey, you think the neighbors can see my rack?
Are we allowed to sit on couch?
So, uh, animals are allowed to sit on the new couch, right?
He's standing right behind me, isn't he.
He’s standing right behind me, isn’t he.
Night gowns!
Night gowns!
Kids are in bed. What'll it be?
Kids are in bed. What’ll it be?
Two Boulevards on tap.  Coming right up. On the house.
Two Boulevard Wheats on tap, coming right up. It’s on the house.
" corner of my mind..." You're drunk, deer.
“Memories…like the corners of my mind…”
You’re drunk, deer.
Don't hate us, Scott! :)
Don’t hate us, Scott!

The deer was not harmed during our little photo shoot. Wait, it’s dead. I mean, how can it possibly be harmed? Scott was the one that harmed it. Technically.

I’ll be sleeping on the couch for the next month.

5 thoughts on “Best. Homework. Ever.

Ok, now it's your turn - write me back.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s