Oh Emma, Oh Kate.

I was playing with sidewalk chalk on our driveway with Kate.

Me: What do you want me to draw?

Kate: A rainbow.

Me: Ok, there. Now what?

Kate: A weed.

Me: A what?

Kate: A weed! Like this! (points to a weed in the mulch)

____________

Kate: We live in a circle.

Emma: We live on a planet, Kate.

Kate: I can’t see the planet.

Emma: You see it all over, Kate!

Kate: But planets are in the sky.

Emma: We are in the sky.

Kate: But I can’t see us!

Emma: You can’t see us if we’re ON the planet. Well, I guess maybe if you take a bunch of trips, you can see the rest of the planet. But not us in the sky. Kate, stop confusing me.

____________

Me: Come on girls, we have to pick up Evelyn (my 5 month old niece)

Kate: Why?

Me: Jenna has to get her classroom ready and I said I would watch Evelyn for her.

Kate: Just tell Jenna to put her on a table.

___________

Kate: I can talk with my eyes closed. Watch.

___________

Kate: Mommy! I’m going to take a picture of you. Say cheese!

Me: No! I’m going to be like you and not smile for the camera (I make an angry face for the camera)

Kate: (Click) Cute!

___________

Kate: Mommy. Sometimes when I fart I can’t hear it. But I always smell it.

___________

The girls were eating apples.

Kate: I got seeds!

Emma: Here Kate, just bury the apple seeds in the yard. That’s what I do.

___________

Kate: How does your body throw up?

Emma: It’s just gets overflowed, Kate.

___________

Kate: I run fast, daddy. Watch.

Scott: You do run fast!

Kate: I’m faster than all the boys.

___________

Kate: Guess what’s in my purse. It starts with an S.

Me: Um….string….silly putty….string cheese.

Kate: No, none of those. It is mommy’s lip glossssssssss.

___________

Kate: It’s cold in here. My bumps are coming up.

___________

Me: Come on, Emma. Let’s go to the neighbor’s house. They’re having a bonfire.

Emma: Do we have to walk?

Me: Yes, we’re walking. It’s not far.

Emma: Mom. I really don’t want to walk. I had PE today.

___________

Me: Kate! Did you meet Bill Snyder last night?

Kate: No. He wasn’t there.

Me: Yes, he was. The old man that signed your helmet.

Kate: That wasn’t the real Bill Snyder.

___________

Kate: I can count to 20.

Me: Ok, go.

Kate: (stares at me. Bobs her head.)

Me: Go.

Kate: I counting to you in my head.

__________

Kate: Emma is going to shoot a deer with daddy.

Me: Yeah, we’ll see.

Kate: You can’t shoot the girl deer or the babies, right?

Me: Yeah, I guess. Is that what daddy told you?

Kate: We just shoot the mean ones.

___________

Kate: It’s wonderful to fart.

___________

Emma: Kate! Get your stinky feet out of my face!

Kate: You need to smell my stinky feet, Emma!

___________

I spent a week watching my 1 year-old niece, Gabby. Special Oh Gabby edition:

Me: Do you girls want to go to Target?

Emma: Yeah

Kate: NO!

Gabby: (shakes her head no)

Kate: YES! I knew Gabby would be on my side!

__________

Gabby: Dada?

Me: Your daddy went to get a taco.

Gabby: Dada?

Emma: He can’t decide what kind of taco, Gabby.

__________

Me: Gabby, can you say Jenna?

Gabby: Den-na!

Me: Gabby, can you say Julie?

Gabby: Yeah.

Me: Can you say JU-LEE

Gabby: Yeah.

__________

(I was showing Gabby a book about Bill Snyder.)

Me: Gabby, can you say Bill?

Gabby: Beeeeel.

Emma: Gabby, can you say Bill Snyder, he’s a legend?

__________

Gabby was hitting Kate’s stomach.

Me: Oh Gabby, be nice!

Kate: It feels good, mom.

__________

Me: Ok, Kate. Time to take Gabby back home.

Kate: Are they done getting tacos? They must have got a lot of them.

11 thoughts on “Oh Emma, Oh Kate.

      1. I can’t express how disappointed I am that Mizzou left the Big 8, Big 12, whatever for the SEC. It would have been awesome to visit you in Kansas and drink your draft beer and watch football while scratching our crotches and shooting crossbows and stuff. I was going to invite myself over, I hope that’s cool.

        Like

      2. That was pretty lame when Mizzou left. You are welcome to come party in Scott’s precious mancave. It’s always a good time when you’re a Wildcat fan!!!

        Like

  1. I vote the “Can you say Bill Snyder, he’s a legend” comment the best! GOLD!
    Oh, and “Sometimes when I fart I can’t hear it. But I always smell it.” Haaaa!

    Like

Ok, now it's your turn - write me back.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s