Thriller.

Yes, I’m talking about MJ’s Thriller. Yeah, I know it’s August. Let me explain.

There comes a time when I get sick of summer. That time is now. The kids can feel it too. Every day is a day filled with boredom. They are sick of everything.

So what do I do with my kids? We shop for school supplies and new shoes, of course.

I am also on a hunt for red skinny jeans and a red leather coat.

Kids, put the Halloween costume catalogs away! It just hit me. We’re going to be Thriller as a family for Halloween! I’m going to be Michael Jackson and you guys will be the zombies with daddy! Ow!

I showed the girls “Thriller” on YouTube. Emma said “Ok, I’ll do it. I just want to be something scary.”

Kate will see Emma’s elaborate makeup and she’ll want to be in on it too. She just doesn’t realize this now.

I started to plan. My mind just wouldn’t stop. I got in the car and took off with the girls.

While blasting MJ's  "Thriller"

I blasted MJ’s “Thriller” in my car. The girls and I got the shoulder and head move down. I stopped dancing at the red lights.

We purchased clothes at GoodWill. I bought brown and black spray paint at Home Depot. I drove past the temporary Halloween store location and got mad when I realized they haven’t even put a sign for it yet. This should really be a year-round store. I mean, come on.

I arrived home. I dug through Scott’s tools and found an electric belt sander. I found my black fedora. I bookmarked zombie makeup tutorials on YouTube. I bookmarked the “Thriller” dance choreography. I bookmarked “how to moonwalk.” I researched how to make my backyard a walk-thru graveyard like the music video. The kids will love it. Maybe we can project the music video “Thriller” on the back of our house. Put it on a loop. AND maybe give a sneak peak a few weeks before by putting MJ’s shadow in one of our front windows:

Boom.

Scott arrived home. I pitched my master Halloween plan and showed him his zombie clothes from GoodWill.

You see? I got all 3 of your Halloween costumes bought for under ten dollars. That’s a deal.

No, I’m not doing this. He’s a pedophile.

Was that proven? He’s Michael Jackson. What do you think of when you think of Michael Jackson?

He raped boys.

No. It’s Beat It. Oh wait, bad example. It’s Billie Jean. It’s Thriller. It’s Smooth Criminal. It’s Bad.

Ok, one. You are not putting a pedophile in our window. What is wrong with you?

Fine. I kinda thought it might be little creepy.

Two. You are not digging in our backyard to make graves.

Shallow ones? I’ll put all the dirt back.

NO. A kid could fall in!

You know, I thought of that. I’ll mark a path with rope lights on the ground. They should show through the fog machines, right? Surely.

No. Under no circumstances are you digging up our yard. Three. Show Thriller on the back of our house on a loop? This isn’t a Vegas show.

Our house would be epic. Come on. Please? All you have to do is be a zombie. The girls will do it too. Maybe I can get some friends/neighbors to be zombies too. YES! I should text Heather.

Oh my gosh. You’re going to make a production out of this. You better get your sisters over here to help you with your dancing. I’d rather be Janet Jackson with a wardrobe malfunction.

Yesssssss…..

I ran to our bathroom. I got my fedora and put my hair up inside. I draw in my eyes with heavy eyeliner. I lightly brush on red lipstick. I draw a distinct line on my eyebrows. I put on my aviators and head back to the kitchen.

How do I look?

I take off my glasses and show him my make up work.

I don’t have my clothes yet, but that will be easy. Just imagine red skinny jeans and red leather coat.

Scott laughed.

Yeah, you do kinda pull off Michael Jackson’s face.

Wait, what?

No.

That is the meanest thing you can possibly say, Scott.

6 thoughts on “Thriller.

  1. Aww…meanie husband. You will be a cute, non-pedophile MJ. I wanna learn the Thriller dance too. Guess I should start practicing for Halloween. Lol. I’m sure Emma and Kate will be cute zombies.

    Like

  2. dusterbed says:

    I think it sounds AWESOME! Smoke machines and real graves? Haunted by a family of zombies? *Cue the music* I can see it now…

    Like

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