Evening from H-E-L-L

I slept in until l pm today.  It’s been forever since I’ve done that.  I’m mentally exhausted from last night.

Scott usually works out after work.  He called me around 5:30 and said he was sitting in the parking lot and didn’t know whether he could drive.  He sounded really out of it, almost slurring his words.  I started to panic and asked what was going on.

He said he walked in the gym.  Didn’t even make it to the locker room because he was so dizzy.  He had to sit on a stationary bike, hoping he wouldn’t fall over.  He slowly walked back to his car and called me.

When he called me, I was in normal 5:00 hell mode.  I was juggling trying to cook parmesan chicken and mashed potatoes.  Kate was hanging on my leg screaming because she was starving for food and attention.  Emma was on the toilet, screaming in pain, because he was so constipated.

I asked Scott if he wanted me to pick him up (although, I had no idea how I could drop everything with Emma screaming on the toilet).  He said maybe.  I hung up with him and called my mom and asked if she could pick up Scott.  She said she could.  I get ahold of Scott again and he said he could probably drive.  He starts to head home–feeling like he’s drunk.  Great.  I couldn’t stop him.

I pull out the chicken and discover not only is it slightly burnt, it tasted terrible.  I thought maybe Kate won’t notice.  I make her a plate.  She had one bite and spit it out.

Emma was still screaming.

Scott walks in and lays down immediately.  He said he felt like he had the bed spins.  He wanted food.  I make him a plate of my terrible dinner.  He said it tasted like dog crap.  So I made him a bowl of cereal.

Emma comes out, still constipated.  She tries to eat my horrible dinner then runs back to our bathroom, screaming in pain.

I follow her to see if I can help.  By this time, it’s Kate’s bedtime.  I get her bath going in our bathroom so I can keep my eye on both of them.  I get Kate washed up.  Emma gets in with her, at my request, to try and get her to poop.  I get Kate out while Emma soaks.

I get Kate’s PJs on.  I feel bad she never got anything to eat so I quickly boil some water to make some noodles for her.  She gobbles them up. Then falls asleep easily as I rock her.

Emma is out of the bath and screaming on the toilet.

Then I hear silence.  I run into our room and see she fell asleep with Scott.  She was naked under our covers.  Never pooped.  I took a break and threw out my horrible meal.  Cleaned up the kitchen.

30 minutes later.  Emma wakes up screaming again.  I go help her get back on the toilet.  I was starting to wonder if I should just take Scott and Emma into the ER.

Finally – four hours of long labor later, a golfball sized poop was born. HALLELUJAH.

Then I remembered I still had to go to the store because we were completely out of milk and bread and dishwasher detergent.  I put Emma in bed with Scott again and she started whining she wanted to go with me.  Egh.

So I take her.  I stock up on anything with high fiber.

We come home and she goes to bed easily after a Fiber One bar.  That’s all she wanted to eat.  And milk.  I’ve never had/bought Fiber One bars…they’re delicious! No wonder she ate the whole thing!

Emma pooped again this morning. Scott ended up feeling better today.  More lightheaded than dizzy.

That was my horrible evening.  I feel like I was putting out a small fire then another one would pop up.  I had big plans to start packing up boxes.  Ugh.  I got nothing I wanted to do done last night.

And I get to look forward to the sh*t fest this family will have after my all my high fiber groceries…

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