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The boy.

19 May
Guess what?

Guess what?

I have a new pair of footsies in the making!

My brother and sister-in-law are expecting their first child. And it’s a boy.

Well, snips and snails and puppy dog tails – Yee-haw! Aunt Jules just got the blessing to shop in the boy clothes section!

I have two daughters. My sisters gave me two nieces. The only thing I know is pink dryer lint. I’ve never been to “the other side” of the baby clothes section. I have caught glimpses of camo and monster truck prints from my land of pink tutus and hair bows. I could look but never touch.

But a nephew. I can fully submerge myself in everything boy. I’m going all out for this kid:

  • I’ll have a football ready for him the moment he is born. He will be in Texas and I will be in Kansas City but the football will be here, waiting for him. I’ll work on my spiral until then.
  • I’ll give his tired parents a break when they visit for the first time. I will rock him to sleep by singing into his little ear. Singing the sweet words of the K-State fight song unbeknownst to his UT grad father and FSU grad mother.
  • I’ll take him to Monster Truck races. We will have the best seats. I will work on my man roar.
  • I’ll flood my backyard with the hose to make mud puddles to stomp in.
  • I’ll take him to Disney World. We will walk past those Disney Princesses and scream down Splash Mountain, front row.
  • After I finish putting my girls’ hair up in ponytails, I will make him a mohawk out of Uncle Scott’s hair gel.
  • I’ll let him take Uncle Scott’s 4 wheeler out for a spin. Emma and Kate will teach him how to drive it.
  • I’ll give him girlfriend advice when he is a teenager. As an aunt, I am automatically cooler than his parents to talk to about girls. I will also be an expert at the teenage girl drama by that point.
  • I will pop Top Gun in the DVD player so he knows the classics. And then I’ll tell his uncle to leave the room because no one wants to hear someone repeating the whole damn script out loud.
  • We will go fishing together, as long as he hooks the worm because ew, Aunt Jules doesn’t do that.

I will be his one and only aunt. I will go all out for him. Not that I don’t go all out for my nieces.

I mean, Aunt Jules doesn't play favorites.

I mean, Aunt Jules doesn’t play favorites.

It will be a nice change to be able to shop for a boy. Scott and his brother will be able to enjoy both sexes of children when they are together. Maybe Scott will let Mark take a turn at fishing for hair from the clogged drain that even Draino couldn’t fix.

Fishing.

Hair fishing in the house of girls.

Little baby nephew, I cannot wait to see your sweet face. I will smoother you in kisses when I finally get to hold you – it’s my official duty as an aunt.

I'm already smothering your wittle sonogram face! I know. I'm getting weirder every time I become an aunt again.

I’m already smothering your little sonogram face!
I know. I’m getting weirder every time I become an aunt again. I can’t stop.

Keep working on growing those footsies. Kick your mom a bunch. Then when you bust out into the world, make sure you give my shirt a good kick too. Like a soccer playa.

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Evelyn Fay.

11 Mar

Thursday, March 7, 2013.

Hey Scott, we should invite Jenna and Steven to watch Emma’s school musical with us tonight. I’ll send her a text later.

Yeah, that text was never sent.

Jenna went into labor that morning. The hours ticked by into the evening. My little niece – nicknamed The Great Bambino – was throwing a curveball at me. I had to chose between attending my daughter’s musical or stay at the hospital to stay near my sister. Torture! Oh, my heart.

5:30 pm: showtime. I had to choose – go with Scott and Emma to the school or stay at the hospital with my sister pushing a room away.

I stayed at the hospital.

Scott took off with Emma and the HD video camera in hand.

I had Miss Evelyn Fay in my arms just about the same time Emma took the stage.

I could not be prouder of both of them. One day, I’ll show Evelyn her cousin’s big school musical. I’ll tell her it was filmed at the exact moment of her birth. Emma, Kate, Evelyn and I will pig out on ice cream while singing along with 6-year-old Emma on the screen. I know Evelyn will just love it.

That’s not the only way Aunt Jules documented her birth. Aunt Jules live-tweeted from the waiting room!

For those that don’t follow me, here is a re-cap:

  • Guess what time it is?! It’s #auntjules time!!! You’re in for a ride, Twitter!

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  • Well crap. Emma’s school play is tonight. Kids kids – Aunt Jules/mommy can’t be in both places! Work it out. #auntjules
  • Yes! Sisters water broke! Baby girl popped that bubble when she knew #auntjules was here!
  • Message from my other sister in Tulsa: “Keep your legs together until I get there.” Hope you understand OK and KS hwy patrol. #auntjules
  • I’m here, baby niece. Inches away. #auntjules

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  • Epidural in. Momma feels better. Oh, I’m crying. I’m crying.#auntjules
  • Ah! Push, push, push that baby girl to meeee!!!! #auntjules
  • My phone is dying. I need a phone charger. How am I supposed to live-tweet this thing?! #auntjules
  • Come on, little girl! Slide out! Weeeee! Like a slip n slide! #auntjules
  • Overheard in waiting room: oh just sittin’ here waitin’ on Jenna to push that baby out of her Va-Jean. #auntjules
  • Overheard in waiting room: Back in my day I would just drive and nurse at same time. #auntjules
  • Tried to sneak back into sister’s birthing room. Nurses said no. I’ll be back, nurses. No one puts #auntjules in the corner.
  • Baby Niece – you have 12% battery power to get out of that watery bubble. Get. Out. #auntjules
  • My niece is here! (And found a charger) 6 pounds, 4 oz!! That’s all I know. I’m about to bust down some doors, nurses!! #auntjules
  • Evelyn Fay is finally in my arms :)  #auntjules
  • It’s my favorite shirt. #auntjules


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Yep – Evelyn was 6 pounds, 4 ounces. Emma was 6 pounds, 4 ounces. My other niece, Gabby, was 6 pounds 4 ounces too.

3 sisters all having first born daughters weighing at 6 pounds, 4 ounces exactly. What are the chances of that?!

Maybe that is why Evelyn decided to come out at that very moment. Maybe she knew her mommy would have pigged out on ice cream with Aunt Jules after Emma’s musical that night. It was some kind of force of nature telling her she needed to come out at 6 pounds, 4 ounces even if that meant throwing a curveball at Aunt Jules. That’s what I get for calling her The Great Bambino.

I love you, Evelyn.

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Child Geniuses.

6 Mar

My sister, Jessica, sent me a video of her 11 month old doing sign language at the dinner table. Baby sign language is adorable. That little Gabby is so smart. I’m tearing up imagining her graduate magna cum laude from K-State one day, just like her mommy.

Scott and I did NOT graduate magna cum laude. Our kids will graduate from K-State following in our own footsteps – with a major in Aggieville. Geniuses, I tell you. Geniuses.

I sent Jessica back a couple videos of her nieces:

 

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To The Great Bambino.

13 Feb

To my unborn niece – The Great Bambino.

Baby girl. I have called you the Great Bambino since the day I found out about your existence. You must be wondering, “but why does Aunt Jules call me Bambino?” I’ll tell you why, little one. I mean, I have nothing else to do. I’m just killin’ time before you are placed in my arms.

There was a baseball player named George Herman Ruth, Jr.. He played baseball a long, long time ago. George was born 118 years ago – whoa! But George is not known as what his mommy and daddy named him. He was given a lot of nicknames: Sultan of Swat, The Great Bambino and most famously, Babe Ruth.

Babe Ruth is considered to be one of the greatest baseball players of all time. If there is one thing he was good at, it was hitting a baseball out of the park. That is not an easy thing to do. Aunt Jules can barely hit the ball two freakin’ feet in front of her. He helped the New York Yankees win the World Series 4 times. It took years and years for anyone to break his records. Babe Ruth was one of the first in the National Baseball Hall of Fame. That’s big time. You can impress your boyfriends with all of this information Aunt Jules just googled.

Ah, Babe Ruth. Did you know your mom’s middle name is Ruth? She is named after your great-grandma. Your Aunt Jules, the oldest, will always see your mom as the baby of the family. Your mom got all of Aunt Jules’ and Aunt JJ’s hand-me-down clothes. She had to share a room with Aunt JJ. She had to play with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles with Uncle Jon. Now, don’t be feelin’ too bad for your mom – she doesn’t know what a curfew is either. This actually may work out in your favor 16 years from now, Bambino.

So when your mom and dad told Aunt Jules that you were on your way into her arms, Aunt Jules could only think one thing: Baby Ruth. Babe Ruth. The Great Bambino. Surely, it’s a boy.

No. Babe Ruth is a girl. She’s the Great Bambino.

Now tell me! Give me a hint in my dreams or something – when will you be here?! What is your real name? Are you bald? Will you be a lefty, like Babe Ruth? Without a doubt, you are very pretty. Aunt Jules is getting impatient. We’re past the 7th inning stretch, here. Aunt Jules needs to hold you, pretty little Bambino. Wrap you up like a ballpark hot dog, maybe in this new blanket Aunt Jules ordered:

Aunt Jules thinks of the best ideas in the shower.

Aunt Jules thinks of the best ideas in the shower.

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Repost: My apologies

5 Aug

I am babysitting my niece, Gabby, this week while my sister is at work. I will have a 6 year old, 3 year old and a 3 month old on my hands. This will be a challenge for me – 3 kids! And to top it off, the baby is not liking the bottle. She’s following in her cousin Kate’s footsteps.

Gabby and Kate say farm fresh milk is where it’s at. Bottles … Ha!

I’m going to need some luck this week. Or working teets.

This is a repost from way back in the day when I was dealing with baby Kate:

I am apologizing to the friends that have repeatedly asked me to join them on a night out on the town. I apologize to my husband who has repeatedly asked me for a date night out to eat or the movies. I apologize to my parents and in-laws that have repeatedly asked if they can babysit Kate anytime soon. I apologize to the Chiefs and KSU tailgating Gods that I will not be in my normal tailgating state which includes bottles of beer and possibly shots of tequila.

I have a baby that will not take a bottle. She flat out refuses. I have tried everything I can think of. I have asked other mothers for advice. You name it, I have tried it.
I have tried the bottle when she’s happy and hungry. When she’s happy and not hungry. When she’s crying and starving. Sleepy and hungry. No, no, no and no. Kate likes farm fresh milk.
The second she bites or sucks on the nipple and something comes out, she makes this incredibly pissed off face. She crosses her eyebrows at me and does a gagging act that should get an academy award. She gags, coughs and spits out whatever is in her mouth then acts like she can’t breathe. It’s all an act.
I am officially done trying to get her to take a bottle. I’m giving up and letting her have her way. So for that, I am apologizing to all that have wanted any time alone with me, just me.
I am sorry.
On the other hand, I am happy that Kate will be a 100% breastfed child. It is the best for her now.
Vodka, Whiskey, and Tequila…I’ll see ya in the spring.

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A Boo Bah is born.

23 Apr

Gabriella Reese

Born April 20, 2012

I’m officially an AUNT! Gabriella came busting into the world on a Friday, just like her Aunt Jules! Her cry sounds like a baby sheep and – no lie – her wail sounds like “boo baaaaahhhh”. She must have listened to my blog post! Although, the child didn’t listen to me about avoiding April 20th as a birthday. She’ll be a feisty one!

>> As a side note, I have come to learn the generations before me do not know what 4/20 means. It’s national weed day, people! AKA- marijuana, mary jane, pot, a “j”, grass and whatever other names kids these days have come up with. I have no idea who decided 4/20 or why 4/20 was picked. It is just known. And dad – just because someone knows what 4/20 is does not make us “all a bunch of damn potheads”.

 

For those of you that don’t follow me on twitter, I put on quite a twitter show for my followers on April 20th. I tried to keep it as non-gross as possible. After all, this will be scrapbooked for Gabriella to read later.

I’m going to be an AUNT!! My sis is being induced tonight!! I will be live tweeting the birth. You’re in for a ride!

Momma is checked in. And I’m on the road to aunthood. #auntjulie

Pit stop in Wichita now Oooooklahoma…where aunt Jules comes sweeping down the plains…. #auntjulie

Dr. broke momma’s water. Baby girl, sorry your bubble got popped but it’s time to meet Aunt Jules! #auntjulie

Momma having strong contractions. Relying on daddy’s texts to keep me updated. Don’t let me down! #multitasking #auntjulie

Now I’m having strong contractions after this hot cup of coffee. I feel your pain, momma. #auntjulie

Well, I know one thing. Baby girl’s name won’t be Mary Jane with a 4/20 birthday. #auntjulie

Epidural is on its way. Baby girl, looks like you’ll be getting drugs today! Obviously, my little Mary Jane. #auntjulie

Momma is at a 10! Push!! Push that baby girl to meeeee!!! #auntjulie

Ugh! Come on! Just a slide away from being an aunt! Slide out, baby! It’s fun! Weeeee! #auntjulie

Very impressed with my bro-in-law texting me with one hand and holding momma’s leg up with the other. #auntjulie

They see the head. Brown hair, not black. Mexican gene didn’t pull thru with this one. #auntjulie

Yes! I’m in delivery room. Aunt Jules got VIP! Still pushing. I’m here, baby!! Let’s hear those lungs cry! #auntjulie

Gabriella Reese is here!! 6 lbs 4 oz!!! I love her. #auntjulie

 

Well, no one told me how much living far away from your nieces/nephews SUCKS. How do you aunts and uncles do it?! I feel like my 3rd kid is living in Oklahoma. Oh, my heart! I should have set up a camera in every room of the house while my sister was in the hospital. Direct feed to Aunt Jules! I’m everywhere, baby Gabs! I have been away for 2 days and I can’t stop looking at my phone for a possible picture from my sister.

I love aunthood almost as much as mommyhood. It’s like having your own kid – minus the 9 months of sobriety, the weight checks, blown up boobs, and labor!

You men have it so easy.

To be continued… the adventures of Aunt Jules and Gabby! It would not surprise me one bit if Gabriella told her teacher she won’t color a Sooner for Oklahoma Day. She already wears KSU purple so well.

 

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