Without this ring.

1 May

DOOMED.

A lost wedding ring.

The old wives say bad fortune is in your future. You might as well be looking for your happy marriage at the bottom of that murky lake.

Superstitious or not, losing a ring will set off panic. Never in your life have you prayed for time to go backwards. For just a few seconds, God. Please. A tiny bit. It was right. here.

And then it’s gone.

That split second can happen all kinds of ways. I polled my Facebook friends. Hey, I do more than stalk on Facebook. I got the party started with this question -

“For those of you (or your spouse) that have lost your wedding ring – how did you lose it?”
  • It fell off my husband’s finger into the ocean. It was the first day of our honeymoon.
  • My husband gave the ring to our girls to play with. Been gone ever since.
  • He lost it in training and his 2nd one got lost while he was deployed.
  • It’s at the bottom of Table Rock Lake. It fell off while cleaning catfish.
  • My husband lost his in the snow, it slid right off. I lost mine after my 2-year-old took it. It was never seen again.
  • I have a nervous tick and I play with it on my finger. I spent hours looking for it in a parking lot.
  • My husband lost another man’s wedding ring. We were at a triathlon and my husband offered to hold a friend’s ring while he did the swim event. My husband went to pull in the buoys out of the water and the ring slipped into the water.
  • Husband lost his in the bottom of a river while canoeing, trying to save another couple from distress. 2nd one in Applebee’s bathroom. I will have to ask about 3rd and 4th rings.
  • Softball field, never found it.
  • Public restroom. Unfortunately, no one turned it in.
  • He threw it in the trash after washing his hands at work.
  • Thought it was lost forever but found it in the laundry basket.
  • Cat knocked it down the sink drain.
  • Workout bag had a hole in the pocket.
  • Divorce
  • Somewhere in our old house. I would love to blame my kids, for that I’m convinced a toddler misplaced it.
  • In the pasture behind our house.
  • Spinning it on the table at “Shot Stop” in Aggieville. It fell between a crack in the wall and the floor. Next time they tear down that bar, I’m going to go get it.
  • Stuck under my bathroom scale.
  • I throw it off in my sleep, but I always find it.
  • Fell out of my pocket while golfing. Luckily, I was with my father-in-law.
  • A beach in Mexico. I was getting a massage and left it in the hut on the counter.
  • Solution: Get the wedding ring tattooed on. (Brilliant, Serena. Brilliant.)

Whoa.

The responses to my research were immediate. I was expecting a handful of men to respond. Instead, my Facebook page turned into a confession box with a line out the door. Men and women. What surprised me the most was how lighthearted everyone felt about their missing symbol of infinite love. There were no sad stories. No said they felt bad. They were sharing a war stories. They survived and could tell the tale.

These people have found the secret – marriage isn’t a sealed deal until one of you lose a wedding ring. Only then you are golden. Oh, and that crap about your ring finger having a vein in it leading straight to your heart is a lie.

Scott lost his ring. We’re in.

You won’t find Scott’s response above. Scott couldn’t respond to my Facebook poll because Scott has no clue where he lost his ring. He left the house with his wedding ring on. He crawled into bed without his wedding ring on. He swore he didn’t take it off. It’s gone. It has been missing for a few weeks now. Stop it, ladies. He’s taken. But you can look at his cute butt.

We will replace the original ring. Maybe we’ll let our daughters help pick out a new ring. We’re not in a rush. We don’t need a ring to prove to the world that we’re married. That’s what a marriage certificate is for.

Oh, wait. Yeah, we lost that like 8 years ago.

DOOMED.

Where did you go?

Goodbye, wedding ring.

Have you or your spouse ever lost a wedding ring? Did you find it or is it lost forever? Have you ever lost anything with sentimental value?

10 Responses to “Without this ring.”

  1. akmerfylou May 1, 2014 at 8:42 PM #

    We haven’t lost one yet, but the hubs did manage to crack his tungsten ring.

    Like

    • Julie May 1, 2014 at 9:02 PM #

      How did he do that??? Is he Superman?

      Like

  2. chaz spedding May 1, 2014 at 8:43 PM #

    Lost mine 4 days after we were married, gave it to my wife to hold while I waterskied, fell off her thumb when she was pulling in the rope. Borrowed someone’s goggles on the beach dove down and found it. Easy to spot on a muddy bottom shining like a diamond in a goats ass.

    Like

    • Julie May 1, 2014 at 9:03 PM #

      Lol diamond in a goat’s ass! Hope your ring smelled better than that.

      Like

  3. snoozing on the sofa May 2, 2014 at 8:45 AM #

    I’ve been systematically fattening up my finger since the wedding day, just to avoid the horror of a lost ring. It’s hard to lose it, if you can’t take it off.

    Like

    • Julie May 2, 2014 at 10:16 AM #

      Ha! Losing the baby weight is hard!

      Like

  4. brickhousechick May 3, 2014 at 9:22 PM #

    Ay, what a bummer! We haven’t lost ours KNOCK ON WOOD, but mine no longer fits! My arthritic fingers make it impossible for the rings to slip in all the way. I’ve got to resize them but it’s never a priority. I wear a different ring now but it doesn’t scream, I’m Married! My husband is not too thrilled about that. ps. you looked pretty badass in your makeover. LOL.

    Like

    • Julie May 4, 2014 at 7:46 PM #

      Lol I LOVE my makeover!! I’m glad Scott was the one to lose his ring. Men’s rings are much cheaper to replace.

      Like

  5. Christy May 5, 2014 at 11:39 AM #

    My first one was lost when I took it off during my 2nd pregnancy, and fingers were so swollen that I couldn’t wear it. When we were unpacking after our move, my husband found it stuck at the bottom of the box, stuck to the tape.
    My 2nd one was lost a few months ago. I had set it up on the shelf on my dresser and I’m thinking one of my kiddo’s grabbed it and thinking it was either the 6, 3, or 2 year old.
    My husband took his first ring, which was quite cheap and wore that during all his deployments (while leaving his good one at home), his final deployment (#5) he split that sucker right in half, when his finger got stuck in something and it was the ring or his finger (which of course is why they’re told not to wear their wedding rings during deployments).

    Like

    • Julie May 5, 2014 at 11:10 PM #

      He split it in half?! That is a crazy (and badass) way to lose a ring! p.s. Please tell your husband we are so thankful for him protecting us! :)

      Like

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