Don’t cross the streams.

5 Mar

Oh, the guilt.

You know what – I’ll just write about it. Writing lifts the guilt off my shoulders.

Then again writing is what got me here in the first place.

Damn you, Twitter. In the space of less than 140 characters I sort of pushed Scott out on the stage to be laughed at. I am also on Facebook but I just copy and paste my tweets there. I texted my sisters. I texted Scott’s family. I texted my friends. I mean, my thumbs just took off with a mind of their own.

fhdja;

(Hey, Don. And Crystal.)

Let me set the scene for you. Scott and I were lifting weights at the gym. I pull one of my earpieces out so I could talk to Scott.

Me: Can you believe Egon died?

Scott: Who’s Egon?

Me: (…stares…)

Scott: (…blinks and shakes his head)

Me: Are you serious?

Scott: Never heard of him.

Me: Ghostbusters?

Scott: Never seen it.

Me: WHAT?! Are you even a boy?

Scott: Uh, I’m not 12.

Me: Uh, but you were once. You grew up in the 80s.

Scott: Never saw it.

My hands lost all control and I dropped my dumbbell. It damn near hit my foot.

WHO IS THIS MAN I MARRIED? I’ve known Scott for 13 years. How did I miss this critical piece of information? It’s like I don’t even know him. He’s a stranger. He has to be the only one out there.

We arrive home. I’m still in a state of shock.

Who you gunna call? My Twitter and Facebook friends!

I threw Scott out to the masses. He IS the only one. Jaws were dropped. We laughed. We cried. We admitted Egon crushes. We reminisced the first time we saw Ghostbusters. We wondered what kind of drugs the creator must have taken to come up with the concept of the Stay Puff Man. I questioned if I should ask Scott if he is a God.

You guys point and laugh at Scott while I slip out the backdoor…

Uh oh.

Scott said nothing about me questioning his manhood. He said nothing about me tweeting my newfound discovery. He didn’t even offer to pick up my dumbbell for me because he knows me.

Are you ready for this?

I have never seen the following movies:

  • Breakfast Club
  • 16 Candles
  • Goonies
  • Pretty in Pink
  • Just a couple scenes from Top Gun
  • Terminator
  • Gremlins
  • The Karate Kid
  • Just a couple scenes from Dirty Dancing
  • Scarface
  • Caddyshack
  • All of the Indiana Jones series minus the first one.
  • I saw Princess Bride for the first time like 4 years ago.
  • Aliens
  • Star Wars
  • Spaceballs
  • All of the Rocky movies
  • Footloose
  • The Blues Brothers
  • Jaws

I mean, give me an 80s movie and I’ve probably never seen it. I don’t have an explanation for this. My parents weren’t strict. My siblings and I rented movies all the time. I guess I just watched the same movies over and over – like Ghostbusters, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Adventures in Babysitting, and Beetlejuice. Oh, and the Back to the Future series. That’s a good one.

So there. Point and laugh. My conscience is now set free. I have gone years laughing at 80s movies quotes from people as if I know what they’re talking about. I don’t. I have no idea.

Scott knew all of this before we got married.

But Ghostbusters.

Scott, sweet husband of mine – “try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light.”

My mind is blown.

Don’t cross the streams.

16 Responses to “Don’t cross the streams.”

  1. peacelovegreatcountrymusic March 5, 2014 at 1:42 AM #

    You’ve never seen Spaceballs. I don’t know what to say. It’s The Godfather of the comedy world.

    Like

    • Julie March 5, 2014 at 9:28 AM #

      Ha! Nope, never seen it. Funny you mention that one, I was scrolling lists of 80s movies and I didn’t know whether I should add that one because I’ve never even heard of it. My head is lowered.

      Like

  2. Lisa Bagchi March 5, 2014 at 7:34 AM #

    Your list is inexplicable. Who you gunna call? Also, my post tomorrow touches on marrying twitter and facebook (SAME BRAIN), but I’m not talking about you there. You are fabulous.

    Like

    • Julie March 5, 2014 at 9:30 AM #

      Thanks! I always look forward to your posts :)

      Like

  3. dusterbed March 5, 2014 at 9:49 AM #

    You need to get all of these movies and watch them at least twice! 80′s movies made the world go around. Bonus points for Ghostbusters aweseomess! Classic stuff. But seriously. Hole yourself up for three days and get that list done.

    Like

    • Julie March 5, 2014 at 10:19 AM #

      Ah! I know. I need someone to force me to do this. I’ve been telling myself this since high school. I did watch Princess Bride. Kinda weird….maybe people like it for the nostalgia? Ha.

      Like

      • dusterbed March 6, 2014 at 9:59 AM #

        HAHA Yes it’s definitely weird. It’s like a crazy comic come to life.

        Like

  4. donofalltrades March 5, 2014 at 11:19 AM #

    You suck worse than your husband at classic movie watching! You must watch Goonies with the girls!

    My wife took the kids to Ace’s school talent show and one of the groups did a skit where the blew up the stay puff marshmallow man and tossed marshmallows into the crowd. Ace and the boys were all like, “what the fuck is this anyway?” Appalled that the kids didn’t get a Ghostbusters reference, Wife and the three kids watched GB1 and 2 last weekend. Lol. You seriously need to see a few of those movies, ma’am.

    Like

    • Julie March 5, 2014 at 11:31 AM #

      Yeah, I know. You know what’s sad is I referred to “Bill Murray gone crazy with gophers” when describing Scott to a Home Depot guy. I was looking for mole killer. That is the only scene I have seen of Caddyshack. Ha!

      Like

  5. brickhousechick March 5, 2014 at 3:11 PM #

    Ay, Dios Mio! I am speechless. But, you can FISH, so I forgive you! :)

    Like

    • Julie March 5, 2014 at 5:25 PM #

      Ha! True! But I did confess. I’m just more of an outdoors woman/book nerd.

      Like

  6. KatieKSU March 5, 2014 at 7:30 PM #

    Ok, I have never watched Princess Bride (gag) but 16 Candles??? You have gone all these years NOT knowing Jake Ryan? Sinful. Holy Hotness. Red Box it immediately!

    Like

    • Julie March 5, 2014 at 7:57 PM #

      Jake who? Lol

      Like

  7. djmatticus March 17, 2014 at 5:49 PM #

    Goonies. Now. Don’t do anything else until you have watched that movie.
    “Hey you guyyyyyysssssssssss!”

    Like

    • Julie March 17, 2014 at 5:54 PM #

      Ha! That’s what I’ve been told. I’ll see if Netflix has it. Consider it added to number 1 position.

      Like

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